Life triangle!

CONTINUING Mistress you ever wondered what most men say? Of course, on the work. Then they can talk a little about women, football, cars, fishing, hunting, beer ... But work is incomparably more important. For many it is life remained the most seductive mistress and the only means by which they can establish themselves in life, to gain credibility, support themselves and family. That work (and not mark the car, not the number of children and money) determines a man's identity, whether individual scientist or an electrician. Even if the scientist (electrician) is considered the perfect family man, even this is just the background of its core activities. Home and family are for him refuge, a place where you can rest, relax, gain strength, trouble with children, to have sex, eat and sleep in the morning, once again pays favorite work. And the grumbling about the "hateful, stupid" work still nothing said. The whole world is astonished Japanese phenomenon: it turns out 70% of Japanese do not know what a vacation. And if there are free days, the male portion of the population uses them for something to improve skills and stay ahead of competitors. On the issue of psychologists: what would you do if you caught on the way earthquake, one hundred and forty people confidently replied: "I telephoned a boss, and only 9% have decided to inform the home. Besides that hatred of the boss and the busy schedule sometimes overwhelmed them, only the work gives people a sense of the Rising Sun country's demand.

This is true not only for the Japanese. The welfare of man, his physical and moral health is directly dependent on how well he is a business and how he demanded and accepted in his team. I do not need to be a psychologist to understand what happens with our strong men who are suddenly deprived of this rod. The dismissal, according to psychologists, the most severe shock for men (we're talking about responsible individiumah to "moths" is irrelevant).



In American textbooks on the psychology of men brought to the scale of stress. According to her, even the death of loved ones stronger sex moves calmer than the crisis in the service arena. The probability of losing their job for most men is the main source of fear. In case of involuntary dismissal of a man overwhelmed by not only morally.



The event pulls the whole "bouquet" of nerve, heart, gastrointestinal, endocrine disorders. Ulcer, hypertension, headaches, sleep disturbances, impotence - a constant companion of similar situations. Education, position, profession, the presence of egg capsules with money and property in this situation have absolutely no value. This affects everything: the rich and poor. And even those who disliked his work: it turns out that for them it was the meaning of life. Women dismissal has never been synonymous with the collapse of the individual, because in her life there are many parallel values and interests. Work - only one of the links in this chain. Vanish is a woman, even if they get frustrated, then quickly fill the empty niche classes with children, house, flowers, embroidery, driving courses, lessons in the gym, chatting with his girlfriend, in the end. And what can fill the emptiness of a man?



The question, agree, almost rhetorically. "Kormilec" blown away, like bursting a balloon. It will collapse, disaster, disaster! And no amount of encouraging exhortations will not be able to take him out of this state.

PERSONAL TRAGEDY familiar situation: the husband offered a job more interesting and better paid. After oscillations (everyone knows that the best - the enemy of good), he agrees. But "promising" work still not in place all the mechanisms, the owners do not know what they want, money for salaries, as it turns out, they do not, and as a result - her husband is on the street. Ask for the old place - pride would not allow it. Also a good place is never empty - and in his chair sits a new man already. Friends, that poor guy turns, something promised to find out and disappear, like snails in shells. My wife seems that nothing terrible happened: think, lost his job and looking for a new one.



But for men, the more so for a long time who worked at one place and not accustomed to the changes taking place - a real tragedy. And if a woman offers a temporary respite, take time out, to do creative work, the husband looks at her as if she were at the time of disaster, invites him to play checkers. Is it hard, she understood only when he sees that he does not sleep the second, third, fourth (and so on) night in a row. Lies there and stares at the ceiling. This is called depression. After ten or twenty years of successful work man realized that he was not appreciated, cast as an unnecessary thing - for such a turn of fate he was not ready. It would seem that you can stop, analyze the situation, look at yourself, draw conclusions and to emerge victorious. But, unfortunately, few are capable of that.

Experience has shown that within each of a strong and intelligent men still live a little boy. This boy can sometimes scared to death of unforeseen circumstances or offended. It feels like a failure, defeated. But compassion, kindness and tenderness of women will certainly fighting back. Should he at least someone to scare! Do not pay any attention to it. And moreover, do not be offended. Otherwise, you can enter the "baby" in a deep depression and destroy the remnants of his self-esteem. Period finding a new job is extremely painful for this category of men. This is not the same as when a person is dissatisfied with the work and looks for a new place in parallel. In this situation, "rejected" Specialist communicates with udachnikami "," winners ", people who do not know the taste of defeat. In addition, men will never recognize their dependence on anyone. Even the dependence on the head, they were not. They think that it is possible at any moment to leave, slamming the door. Forced to find a new place destroys this theory.

Your strength in your devotion So what wife? We are talking about those who seek to understand and help her husband. It turns out that the majority are not psychologically ready even to ensure that the conduct with your spouse longer than before. My wife like and understands that a good idea to temporarily free download husband chores, but when they both go to the store or market can not hide the irritation. And tomatoes it is not those bought and took a lot of sausage, and the bag is not so complicated. Constant presence in the house "on its territory" of another person brings out a very patient owner.

In such a nervous situation should be protected not only the mental state of a spouse, but his own. Do I have to go shopping together? Send him one, and tune yourself to the fact that, indeed, will be bought is not quite what you wanted. Your frustration and comments only aggravate the situation, and praise, even hypocritical, is able to inspire.



In the end, whether due to a pair of rotten tomatoes and stale bread to spoil the relationship? This is a trifle compared with what is happening in the soul of this man.
So it turns out that the weak, fragile women have to raise and support the ailing "support". Only love, wisdom and dedication will be in the most faithful supporters. And if you run out run out of power and love for the weak hands adult, pity and love the small, helpless boy, who lives in his soul. It is not so difficult. Need only be able to see who is in you need.